Wednesday, 25 November 2015

Job Profiles: Ginger and Bridget Edition

Inspired by Jen at Wyvern Oaks' great (and much more insightful) posts on the herd dynamics around her place.

I'm going to make my version a little crazy, because I'm in that kind of mood.

Ginger: 

Life Ambition: VP of The Herd. Likes power and attention, but insecure underneath it all and prefers someone is still there to make the big decisions.

Actual Job Title: VP and Interim President of The Herd.

Strengths: Everyone likes her. Smart, ambitious, generous, looks after her staff and is respected. Motivated to do a good job, hard worker.

Weaknesses: Emotional and can crack under pressure. Insecure in herself, so wants to be friends with everyone, flirts with the boys.

Office Rumor: Persistent rumors she's interviewing for a bigger, more glamorous gig and may leave The Herd.

Summary: Super fun, beautiful and likable, but brings way too much of her personal drama to work. Her staff regularly miss lunch because of last minute 'important' meetings, topics including: How the guy in payroll brushed up against her and she's pretty sure it was no accident; Changing the dress code to formal/black tie because everyone should look as fabulous as her; How she's fairly certain she saw the IT Manager staying in the same exclusive hotel as her on vacation (which there is no way she should be able to afford on her salary!) Everyone still likes and respects Ginger (even that guy in payroll) because they all secretly wish they could be more like her. All the silliness and gossip is a cover for a high IQ and natural talent- she'd rather be liked socially than risk intimidating anyone.

Bridget:


Life Ambition: Ruler of the Universe

Actual Job: IT Manager. Speaks a different language than the others. No one actually knows what she does all day (or ever sees her working) but apparently she has a couple of staff members and is critical to the survival of The Herd.

Strengths: Super smart, independent, resourceful.

Weaknesses: Unmotivated to tackle "boring" tasks. Knows how smart she is and thinks herself superior to all other members of The Herd. Keeps management busy with complaints related to her disrespectful behavior. Doesn't care because if she gets fired from The Herd, she'll do just fine as an independent contractor, thanks very much.

Office Rumor: There are rumors she's a black market hay dealer, hacker and/or international spy in her spare time, but no one knows for certain since even HR has no resume or home address on file...

Summary: The pony everyone loves to hate because she's so rude and condescending but frustratingly she's the smartest equine in the company and gives no shits what anyone else thinks of her. Keeps The Herd running smoothly behind the scenes; fantasizes about running the place, because in her mind she'd do it better than anyone else. Too bad The Herd is biased against super smart little bay mares making it to the top...yep that's it, it's nothing to do with her abrasive personality, nope, couldn't be that!



14 comments:

  1. hahahaha this is awesome - i see what you did there with the 'IT manager' bit, too perfect! also i giggled at "Changing the dress code to formal/black tie because everyone should look as fabulous as her"

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    1. I was going to be serious about the herd dynamic here, but honestly, these ponies have such huge personalities it seemed more appropriate to got totally over the top with it. Glad you liked it!

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  2. We love your super equestrian blog, so why not come and post it for more coverage at Haynet, the UK's No1 Equine Blogging Network! Come and visit us at www.hay-net.co.uk

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  3. I suddenly realized that I just might be a bay mare named Bridget!

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    1. Oh good, more of us! As I wrote it I realized I am also eerily similar to a bay mare named Bridget :)

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  4. This is hilarious and awesome :-)

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